Ending a Relationship Breaking Up is Hard To Do

Ending a Relationship Breaking Up is Hard To Do

Does your to-do list look something similar to this:

.       Looking at your ex photos, messages and memories
· Walk dog
· Water plants
· Break up with significant other

Ending a relationship is hardly at the top of anybody’s calendar, the truth is that when a relationship went sour, someone has to make the move to end it.  The fact remains that many relationships last long beyond the “expire by” date just because breaking up is difficult to do.

Sometimes a break up happens in dramatic fashion with apparel being thrown out of a second story window.

In other cases, the relationship just peters out until someone says “it’s caput.”

So How would you go about ending a relationship to ensure that neither gets hurt?

You need to get clear on the reasons you want to terminate the romance.  The straightaway reason that jumps into your mind may not be the real reason.  As soon as you get clear, the next step in ending a relationship is to get honest.  This means that in your discussion with your lover that you are true to yourself and to him or her.

Schedule a mutually convenient time for a breakup.  Generally, it is best to do it personally instead of over the phone, but if distance is an issue in the relationship, you ought to do it sooner than wait for a time you can get together.

Get into a state of compassion when ending the relationship.  If you wish to remain friends after the break up, you need to conclude the romantic ties with love and compassion.

Don’t put your lover on the defensive.  Discuss the things you’ve learned and the memories you will cherish that have come from your relationship.  Be present during the break up.  Your partner may become very emotional during this time.  You need to respond to their needs.

Don’t take anything into your heart when ending a relationship.  Your partner may say things they don’t really mean.  Let these words roll off of your back.

Your partner might need to meet with you a few times to conclude the relationship.  Or, they may need space.  Give your ex lover what they need to get through the transition time.

But do not let them to make you feel guilty.  You are prepared to begin a new phase in your life and it will not include a romantic relationship with your ex.  It's best if you continue a good relationship of some sort with them, but if you're terminating the relationship for the correct reasons, it is best for the two of you.

Should you ever consider reconnecting?  Does ending a relationship always mean “the end ?”

That is certainly something you have to make up your mind.  Virtually all relationships can be fixed if certain conditions are met.  If you have the time and are also willing to make the effort, you can get through this period being an even stronger couple.

Nevertheless, if you are determined to walk away, it’s best to end a relationship with a clean break and move on to start a fresh life